That night (Thursday, my last post), I felt a ton of movement all at once and then more and more throughout the evening until I went to sleep. It was the most wonderful feeling. Since then, I have resolved myself to just be patient and be thankful for everything I have so far.
I have this really amazing gift to be able to spend so much time with my child before he or she is born. It’s something I took for granted with Malcolm that I refuse to do again. Malcolm spent his entire life in my body and, though I know I was thankful then, nothing can compare to the feeling I have now. I try to stop every day at least once to reflect on how this time, though it feels like only preparation, is so precious. Every time I feel a movement or a kick or a wobble, I have to remind myself that this is the best.
Of course, thinking this way definitely sets me up for a gigantic let down if anything bad happens, but I think I’m beyond any hope of protecting myself at this point. Might as well love every minute and completely submit to my hope for the future. I am so excited for our 20 week appointment (just 17 days to go!). I can’t wait for this child to have a name.