More Waiting. 17.4

Appointment was great last week – heartbeat was normal, I measured fine, and my blood pressure was normal!

So now I’m just hanging around waiting for that big ol’ 20 week appointment.  That’s been sort of my milestone for feeling like everything will be ok.  Once we see the whole body and the heart and all the bones and everything is good, I will be able to let go of some of the rest of this stress I’ve been holding on to.  Not all of it, obviously, but some.  Maybe a lot.

I started feeling the baby move pretty definitively a week ago.  I sat down on a plane on my way to do some work in Ohio and just about as soon as I buckled my seat belt, I felt the little jabs.  I remember feeling Malcolm’s little jabs for the first time. It was the same exact feeling – I almost started crying in front of an old man who had ordered a Bloody Mary with two tiny bottles of vodka.  Something tells me that would have ended badly.

So I’ve pretty much felt a good amount of little jabs every day since then.  Until today.  I don’t know if I just haven’t noticed them or maybe I’ve been paying too much attention in the last few hours…probably a little of both.  I’m just not going to feel ok until I have consistent movement at most or all times of the day.  And it’s still a little early for that.

And so I wait.

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